In Honor Of National Adoption Month

Well, I just did make it....Today is the last day of November and since November is National Adoption Month, this post will be dedicated to this special time of adoption awareness! I love this time of year (Even before I was an adoptive parent) because our local radio station airs Family Life Today and they normally have such great adoption info for this month. I know a lot of emails went around about the 20/20 episode on adoption this week too. We were so blessed to have an adoptive family at our church of children born here in America speak today on their new ministry for adoptive families/children.

We believe that God called us to Ukraine to adopt our children and since we came in contact with so many of the orphans there, we have a special place in our hearts for them. I put this video on the blog once when we first started the blog, but thought I would add it to this post today also...you may have to turn the music off at the bottom of the blog page to hear music on the video.....



This video gives some of the unfortunate sitations the orphans face and in my opinion probably doesnt even touch the surface of some of it. In Vitali's orphanage, I do believe that the caregivers did the best they could with what they have and we actually loved many of the caregivers and orphanage director, but when we got home, the doctors told us that for Vitali to be in the condition he was in when we arrived home, he would have had to have been in a baby bed about 20 hrs a day most of his life. That we are aware of yet, he actually has no gene to be special needs or disabled, but all of his special needs are results of his living environment at the orphanage and choices others made that affected him while he was developing in the womb. Inna's orphanage had approximately 300 kids and Inna is very open and tells us often about the things she experienced there and in her past.


(I certainly am no expert on adoption, but these are just some of my thoughts from what I have seen)
Like the video showed, most kids over 4 or 5 are rarely adopted. I have to believe this is in the U.S. and international. From what I understand, it seems the reason is that most families are concerned with psychological/behaviorial issues from a traumatic past in older children. I am sure there are those who do not have such issues, but the truth is from what we have found, Yes, when you go into these older kid orphanages, you should be prepared for such things as it is almost impossible for a child to miss the basic stages in life and parental bonding, go through the trauma that they have that landed them in the orphanage, and experience orphanage life without having some sort of psychological/behavior/emotional, etc...issues, even if just a mildly temporary thing for some. That is one reason the decision to adopt is taken seriously, but will be worth it. To be honest, we have been through several of the behaviors talked about on the 20/20 interview and it is not easy, but when God calls you, he also gives you the strength to get through it and blesses you and he certainly has for us. The decision to adopt is the decision to love unconditionally. Not to mention, sometimes we have to go through lifes hardest things to experience God's greatest miracles! There are many ways that we have been able to understand more of the heart of God through watching him work in HUGE ways in our older adoptive child. We have learned to live life one day at a time and focus on the day at hand and turn the past and the future over to our heavenly Father who wants the best (best= that which draws us closer to him) for each of our family members. There are so many awesome older children in these orphanages who need an earthly family who is willing to love them unconditionally and in return, if that is your family who is willing to take them in, I do believe God will bless you more than you can imagine!!!

Before I close~ In honor of adoption month, we would like to bring before you 3 specific children from Inna's orphanage that I ask you to be in prayer for.
The first 2 are Lena and Valya that I have brought up before (Inna's best friend and best friend's sister). We receive letters from them often and Inna writes back. Jason and I pray for them and have been checking into trying to get them to America on a hosting program, hopefully in the summer for a little while in our home or however the Lord leads. We are prayerfully going forward with this and not sure where it will go, but taking it step by step for now to try to make it possible. Would you please pray that God will give us clear direction with this along the way and please pray for these girls. We will update you as we get more info!

Also, the other girl we ask you to pray for is Olena. Some of you may have seen in the comments section a few post back from 21 yr old Cristina from Italy. She contacted us through the blog about Olena that happened to be in the same orphanage as Inna and Cristina's family desperately would like to adopt Olena. I have asked Cristina if I could share more about her story and ask my blogging friends to pray specifically for her situation. It turned out that yes, Inna knows Olena and even remembered Cristina visiting her orphanage after pictures were sent. One very upsetting fact that we learned while at Inna's orphanage was that many of the children there are not available for adoption because their parents took them to the orphanage and signed that they will be back in 3 yrs (because it looks better), but have no intentions of ever coming back. This was told to us by our facilitator/translator. Most of the children are only available for adoption if their parents loss rights for abuse/neglect or died. The other children will never have an opportunity to have a family and will "graduate" from the system into what you have seen in the video. I am so amazed with Cristina of how much love she seems to have for Olena. She travels from Italy to visit Olena in the orphanage and has even spent the night in the orphanage with Olena, which believe me is a HUGE thing. Olena is one of the children that have not been released for adoption by her dad, but yet from what I understand does not see Olena or would not be fit to take care of her. Would you please join us in specifically praying that God will cause the things that need to take place in order for Olena to be in the best care and that His will will be done for Olena. Please pray for Cristina and family that God will comfort them and bless them in the meantime. Let's let Christina know that we will be praying!! Cristina let us know if there are any changes!

Comments:
"Our Family"~ Thanks for the comment on our blog. By the way, we heard you on Faith Radio with Jill the other day while we were riding in the car...it was a great interview!

A Happy Thanksgiving!

We had a great Thanksgiving Day! It was Inna and Vitali's first Thanksgiving ever and they seemed to enjoy the day. Grant has tried to fill them in on what happens on each holiday, but I am sure it is hard to remember all these new things at once, so I got tickled the night before when I heard Inna having a conversation that sounded like this:

Inna: Vitali, tomorrow is Thanksgiving and we get candy.
(then, lots of cheering from Inna and Vitali).

Mom: Actually, hate to be the bearer of bad news, but that is the Fall Festival where you get candy.

Inna: Oh Vitali, tomorrow is Thanksgiving and we are going to get presents.
(Again more cheering from Inna and Vitali)

Mom: Ummm...sorry, but actually, that is Christmas :)

Inna: Huh, then what do we do on Thanksgiving?

Mom: Well, we get to eat a special dinner with our family and it is a day to give thanks, etc....

Inna & Vitali cheer again, but not quite as enthusiatic as before :)

We did have a great lunch and have had left overs twice since then :) Grant checked out a book from his library at school of the story of the Pilgrims and the 1st Thanksgiving and he wanted to read it to us all that morning and then, we all went around and told things we are thankful for and prayed together. It was a great start to our day!

Then, later in the day the kids talked us into going to see the movie "Bolt", which was another first for Inna and Vitali as they had never been to a movie theatre before! They loved it and it was a great first movie to take them to! At times I amazed as I try to wrap my mind around what it must feel like for them to experience these things for the first time, especially for Vitali who had never been outside the 4 walls of his orphanage until 6 months ago. It is really an eye opener of all the things that we take for granted and never notice or the things that we have become numb to because we see everyday...they notice EVERYTHING and if you have been around them for 2 minutes or more, you already know that they touch EVERYTHING they can get their hands on. Inna watched the movie intensely and Vitali was very vocal throughout taking on every emotion as if he was in the movie himself. He loves vehicles of any type, so if there was a car that crashed or turned over, he would scream out, "OH NO, IT'S BROKEN"!!!! I couldn't help but to think back to our first month or so home when he was just getting used to riding in a car and would scream and duck everytime a truck would go by us on the road and now, he LOVES for trucks to go by, especially school buses.

Hope you had a GREAT Thanksgiving Day too!!!

Trip to Oklahoma

Over the weekend, Grant, Tiff, my mom, and brother Jacob were able fly to Oklahoma to Caleb's graduation from basic training for the Army. Since Jacob works for Delta, we were able to fly on buddy passes, which is always a huge blessing! Everyone got out on the first flight, except for me and Jacob...me because someone had to stay back with one of our big pieces of luggage with Caleb's clothes that couldnt be checked in (long story) and Jacob because he was working and flew out on the late flight with me. I actually had 6 hrs in the airport by myself, but it went by so quickly. I am still amazed at how Ukraine still comes across my path so often even after the adoption...while at the airport, I ate lunch at Moe's and there was no seating, so a girl asked if should could sit at the table with me and we began talking and she shared with me that her husband is from Ukraine and she is from Moldova (by Ukraine) and her dad was born in Ukraine. I couldnt believe out of all the people in the airport, she had sat at a table with me and I told her about Inna and Vitali and we were able to share so much info with each other. She said that her family moved here a long time ago for religious freedom during communist times. She had so much to tell me about her experiences there and I had things to share with her as she had never visited an orphanage there, but had heard of the conditions. We exchanged email.

Jason wanted to go the graduation, but unfortunately does not have any more days off work from our Ukraine trip until May, so we video taped it for him. We felt that it would be best not to try to take Inna and Vitali yet since it is very unpredictable how they will do in new places, especially crowds of people, although this truly has gotten 10 times better than when we first came home.

The graduation was great and we are so proud of Caleb for his accomplishment. He seems to truly love the Army and passing his physical test did not come easy as he went into the hospital while he was there and we were all praying that he would recover enough to pass his physical test, which HE DID!!!!!!!
Here are some pics of the day:





Tiff had her 17th B-day this week! One way we celebrate b-days at our house is the b-day person gets to make the menu of their favorite foods for dinner one night (of course, I do the cooking, so I wil choose to go out to eat on mine) or choose to go out to eat. Tiff planned her b-day menu 2 months ago of her favorites and she has been waiting ever since. She chose:
Appetizer: Southwestern Salsa & chips (A great bean dip that she and I make)
Chicken Crescents
Green bean casserole
Mac-n-cheese
Desert: Chocolate Trifle

Also, HAPPY BIRTHDAY THIS MONTH TO JOEY, KATIE, & MOM (GIGI)...Mom's is today!!!!!

Adoption "stuff" learned along the way #4:
I don't know how many of you journal, but I do keep a spiritual journal that usually is quite in depth writing. I have this blog that purposes as a journal for our family, but there are many things that happen every day in our adoption that would not be ideal to share on a blog, but to keep a personal journal of and eventually be able to go back and remember what you have made it through and even laugh about somet things later. I am a huge believer in a journal, because when you go through another trial, you can always look back at what you have already made it through and it gives you hope and builds your faith for the new trial. Anyway, up until recently, I had not been keeping a personal journal of the day in and out of our family happenings and a friend told me, "You have just got to write all of this down before you forget." She said even if you just write a one liner sum up for each child per day. I thought, yeah right, there is no way I could write just one line, but I gave it a try and it turned out to be great advice...it doesnt take but a second before I go to bed and I can already tell it is going to be great to look back at. Also, another awesome lady that I just met that owns an adoption agency and has adopted many children herself with special needs and said that one way she has gotten through the hard times is humor...so she deals with the trial during the day and then tries to find something humorous to journal about it that night. Afterall, laughter is the best medicine!


Comments:
Smurfette: I know the Joe Deertay look brought back fond memories for you...it almost looked as good as your Happy Day's Joni look...lol!

Kevin & Tammy~ I have enjoyed keeping up with your journey! So glad ya'll are doing well!

It's Been Six Months!

6 months ago, Inna and Vitali arrived in America and joined us as a family in their new home! It has been a wild ride so far at the Hall home with lots of ups and downs, lots of laughing and crying, lots of tantrums and behaving, lots of frustration with the "too hard" and celebration with the "made it through", lots of missing friends and making friends, lots of talks about the past and talks about the future, lots of calls to be on Jerry Springer(just checking to see if you are still there...Ha! :)lots of difficult doctor's visits and thankfulness for the easy visits, lots of expected struggles and lots of unexpected miracles, lots of learning what love is and what it is not. Anyway, you get the picture....

If you are another adoptive parent, you are familiar with "Gotcha Day" and for those who arent, Gotcha Day is usually the day most adoptive parents celebrate once a year of when their family came together. A lot of people celebrate Gotcha Day as the day that their child came out of the orphanage forever, but we are going to celebrate our Gotcha Day on the day that Inna and Vitali came home and we were ALL together since when they came out of the orphanage we couldnt all be there. I know a lot of families go to dinner on this day, but I would love to hear any other ideas of how your family celebrates this day.

To celebrate 6 mos, I am posting some pics below of when we first met in Ukraine and now...I will go from youngest to oldest....

Vitali in Ukraine:






Vitali now:







Grant in Ukraine:



Grant now:







Inna in Ukraine the first day we met:



Inna now:



Jason in Ukraine:


Jason now:


Mel in Ukraine:

Mel now:




Adoption "stuff" we have learned along the way #3:
We were given this advice by one of our social workers, I may have touched on this in an earlier post (can't remember). In Ukraine, the kids are not supposed to take anything with them from the orphanage. Now, can you imagine that you are leaving the place where you live now, except that you cannot take one thing with you, not even your clothes, not even one thing familiar to you. Inna's and Vitali's orphanage did allow them to wear the clothes they had on out of the orphanage(this is not the norm from what I understand), but this is absolutely all that Inna had to bring with her from her past was the clothes on her back and when she got home, she actually wanted to send those back in case the other girls needed them. Our social worker recommended buying a few things that you could ask the orphanage director if you could trade out the new things to leave at the orphanage for your child's familiar things....like new sheet for the child's sheet they are used to sleeping on with familiar feel and smell, new toy for maybe your child's favorite toy at the orphanage, new clothes for an outfit they are used to wearing, etc... Don't forget to ask for any pictures. Our kid's orphanages did not have any pics to give us, but you never know if you don't ask. We were able to get Vitali's hat from the orphanage (the one you see in a lot of his pics from Ukraine) and he loves that hat. He even wore it around the house in the summer some. Also, his prize possession is his "Meeska", which is a little mouse that was given to him when he left his orphanage. He sleeps with it every night, took it the first day of school here in America, and likes to carry it around with him. It has been very obvious how much it means to him and every night when I give him a kiss for bed, he holds Meeska up for me to kiss goodnight. Hope this helps some!

Comments:
Ukrainiac~ Loved hearing about your patriotism all the way from Ukraine! I am so glad you are able to send in the absentee vote! Grant will appreciate that too when he runs for president :)

Dad~ nope...our candidate did'nt win this time...glad you joined me in American pride on voting day at the polls though :) Now, just praying for our country and new leaders!!!

Mrs. Huff~ We did see your comment on the slide show. Thanks for letting us know that you checked on us. Inna saw some papers a few weeks ago that ya'll had worked on and she said, "I miss Mrs. Huff". Hope you are doing well!

Did You Vote Yet Today??

Does anyone else get emotional inside standing in line to vote...or is just me??? In a long line of many people commenting on just how long the lines are, etc.... (By the way, I have never understood why if we know we are going to be in a long line beforhand, why most people don't catch up on some good reading or even a magazine they enjoy...I have always brought a book with me and the time goes by so quickly) I always find myself feeling a little teary eyed and feeling really patriotic on voting days, especially for president (Actually, being a woman, I probably get teary eyed on many days for many things). I am not always exactly sure why except that on voting days I remember how blessed I am to live in a country with such freedoms to vote for my beliefs and I think it always reminds me of the values our country was founded on and the blessings that we live under in America as a direct result of being a nation established as ONE NATION UNDER GOD and how so many in the past have given their lives for the cause and then I think of the efforts of some to move our country away from these very things that we were founded on and that makes us a blessed nation and then I think Caleb (my brother) joining the military this year has brought a new meaning to voting this year too! I know Caleb's heart and why he joined was because he felt that this was what God called him to do for this time and has come to love his country so much that he feels honored at 26 yrs old to put his life on hold to serve his country and from his letters to us, they are telling him he can probably expect to go to war in the upcoming year. He seems to be making a big impact in his platoon. He says church is Awesome and he has been able to share about the Lord to so many of the men there and in his last letter he said that they are reading scriptures together and he gave his Bible away to one of the guys didnt have one ( I didnt even know that and in the last letter we sent him, we filled in the whole back page with scripture so he could just have some in front of him...GOD IS SO GOOD!) He said they now have, most of the guys in his platoon going to church together there. We are going to his graduation at the end of this month in Oklahoma...probably another teary eyed day, haha!!!

Anyway, hope you exercise your right to vote!!

By the way, Grant has already told Vitali last week that one day Grant will be the president of the U.S. and Vitali will be the president of Ukraine! I told them a few of the special priveledge that Mama hopes to have if that happens, haha!!!
He just looked at me like, "No, I am serious" and I could see those wheels turning of all that he would do if he were president. Those wheels are always turning and I am so thankful because he is very insightful and has so much discernment regarding people, he catches things that mama and daddy miss sometimes.
One cute story from the other day was we were all somewhere and someone gave us the question if we could meet any person in the world who would it be...and when it got to my turn, I was really stumped...you know there is a million people I want to meet, but you know how your mind goes blank when you are put on the spot. I just kept continuing to think and Grant said, "Oh, I bet I know...I bet you would love to meet Sojourner Truth"...WOW...SOJOURNER TRUTH (I didnt even know he knew who she was yet) and to think my limited mind was more on the lines of someone like Kelly Rippa, haha!!! I said, "Oh YEAH, YES, I WOULD"!

GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!!!!!!

Fall Fun!!!

We have had a fun week of the pumpkin patch, school parties, and Fall Festivals! Vitali and Mama went on a field trip with his class at school to the pumpkin patch in Clanton, AL. The first pic is of Vitali on the hayride to get to the pumpkin patch. I think he was most impressed by the tractor pulling us. Then, when we got off the hayride, he began looking for his perfect pumpkin (I think we actually picked up every pumpkin in the patch) and of course the day wouldnt be complete without falling head first into a burr bush...so somehow he managed to fall right in the middle of it head first and came out covered in burrs, even in his hair. I don't know what kind it was, but it felt like thorns, much sharper than it looked. The third pic is of the final pumpkin that he picked :)

These are of Vitali's school party.


Fall Festival Night:
Holidays are a lot of fun, because it is neat to see them experience for the first time the things that we are so used to having every year. They had a great time and Inna said, can we do this all again tomorrow! Grant dressed up as Price Caspian from Narnia for school, but then decided to be a football player that night. Vitali was Thomas the Tank Engine, but Inna kept telling people he was Tom and Jerry because she forgot what it was called and so Vitali starting thinking that too and started answering that he was "Jerry" for Tom and Jerry until I reminded him that he was Thomas...it was so funny! He actually has come to love Thomas the Train since being home, but with the new language, they sometimes get their words switched around...it adds some extra fun into an already great time!






Last are a few of Grant's football pics at The Lions stadium where he played. Football season just ended and he had a great time and made a lot of great friends! He is now moving on to wrestling which is another thing he has wanted to do for a while, but we had him wait until this year. I don't know how he could love it as much as he loved football, but we'll see and he is just waiting for football to start back up already for next year. In the pic of the teams on the field, he is in the maroon jersey on the field closest to my camera. He has also really into Alabama football now and waits with excitement to watch the games! Roll Tide by the way!